Just as mate can not be passed over in a thorough examination of Argentine culture (because we all know that's the kind of examination I'm doing LOLOLOL), so must we fix our eyes on the great Latin American religion:
SOCCER.
Now, as some of my readers will know-- and by "some" I mean "everyone who is not from the U.S. and like three people who are"-- the World Cup is currently causing heart attacks across the globe. And the hero of the World Cup (at least for Argentines) is Lionel Messi, 27-year-old captain of the Argentine team. He is a wondrous creature.
First thought: "So majestic"
Second thought: "Why does he look like a leopard?"
I had heard many a passing comment about this "soccer god" and finally got to experience his impressive capabilities during the first Argentina game of the World Cup (here called the Mundial-- literally meaning "Global.") A half-hour bus ride took us to Parque Centenario, where an LCD screen had been constucted to quench the futbol-lust of several hundred fans.
Bask in the electric glow of pure emotion
Still some glow in the corner there, do you feel it
This was the second World Cup game I had ever watched. I am not experienced in "the soccer." I had to ASK how long games last (answer: 90 minutes). I am not part of this world. I didn't know which player Messi was, because let's face it, they're all dressed the same and they run around in confusing little circles. Also, Messi is unusually short. His nickname is "La Pulga," or "The Flea," in reference to his size and agility. How am I supposed to keep a little tiny, speedy guy in my sights?
Anyway, I finally figured out which one was him. My first Messisighting occured in three distinct stages:
1:"Ohmahgoodness, I am so excited to see this guy play. Everybody says he's amazing. I can't wait for him to get the ball. Wow. Wow."
2: "Probably he's not thaaaaat much better than everybody else. I'm setting my hopes a little too high."
3: (actually sees him play) "AAAAUUUUUGHGHGHHGHGHGHG I'VE NEVER SEEN ANYTHING SO PURELY AMAZING IN MY WHOLE LIFEEEEE"
He's really good, you guys.
Messi appears on advertisements for many things including stuff that has nothing to do with soccer. I've begun keeping a log of his appearances:
The text on this sign reads, "Proud of the product of our ground." (i.e., Messi)
Observed in my classroom building. Vaguely creeped out by the level of hero-worship.
Drink Coke and you too can emerge victorious from your previous state of 2-D-ness
Buy this television so you can look at Messi better!
Please note the juxtaposition of "Dios" (meaning "God") and Messi's head. THIS IS NOT A COINCIDENCE.
There he is, on some Lay's potato chips. Just in normal clothes, not his unifom or anything.
Messi is number 10. It is by far the most popular jersey you will see around here.
I bought myself a celeste-and-white jersey and took a picture drinking some mate. I could only be more stereotypically Argentine IF....
....I was eating an alfajor while reading a short story by Julio Cortazar.
Soccer is weird. Argentina is weird. Probably I am weird for not pooping my pants from excitement that the Mundial is taking place in the neighboring country. Maybe someday.
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